I’m sitting here right now rubbing my eyes, inhaling a cup of coffee, listening to Game Grumps in a lost tab and loathing the idea of walking into the cold white death of the outdoors. And in this state I can only think of one word to describe this situation:
Nothing is particularly wrong or “bad” yet nothing is particularly amazing either. I am superbly content yet extremely unhappy. Oh god, I’m being paradoxical.
Regardless, I figured such shitty weather and such exhaustion from maybe or maybe not staying up till three in the morning cross-stitching calls for story-time. Huzzah.
When I was a freshman in High School, the age of the internet was at an all time buzz. It was a MySpace land filled with beautiful people who used the blur tool too much and yet made unrealistic expectations of a blemish free face, that made someone going through those “awkward” years yearn for.
Nowadays the fad is pre-treated face masks or magnetized face masks, (go back sixty years and try explaining that to someone), but then it was all diy face crap and “magical” ways to make yourself look less like a real being and more like a MySpace celebrity, mostly because we were all broke as shit.
Toothpaste. Take a dab of toothpaste and put it on “problem” areas and poof they will disappear. Now I had done this before and sometimes it really did seem to work – sometimes it made it so much worse. I was at a new school, really self-concious about not being the weird new kid and I was determined to NOT be brace and acne face.
“My whole face is a problem area.” That was my logic.
I smeared a shit-ton of toothpaste all over my face and within seconds I was in crippling amounts of pain. I spent the next twenty or so minutes with my face buried in a piping hot towel because air on my face made me want to actually die.
So yeah, don’t do that.
Tell me if you’re ever had a brilliant idea go wrong. I like laughing.